Medical treatment - which parent can decide?

My ex husband has decided that my son needs orthodontry treatment and so has gone ahead - without my knowledge or consent - to taking him to the orthodontist and getting him braces fitted.

When I heard of this (from my son, not from my ex or from his nanny), I wrote to my ex to ask him why he had done this without my consent and asking him for details of the orthodontist so that I can ask various questions about my son’s treatment.

My ex has not replied to my email and has simply gone ahead and has had the treatment started - braces fixed.

Now I’m really annoyed about this. I agree that my son should have the braces fitted but that’s not the point. The point is that my exhusband had no right to go ahead and give medical treatment to one of our children without my consent. I have parental responsibility, which means:

What is parental responsibility?

While the law does not define in detail what parental responsibility is, the following list sets out the key roles given on the government website: http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/ParentsRights/DG_4002954

  • providing a home for the child
  • having contact with and living with the child
  • protecting and maintaining the child
  • disciplining the child
  • choosing and providing for the child’s education
  • determining the religion of the child
  • agreeing to the child’s medical treatment
  • naming the child and agreeing to any change of the child’s name
  • accompanying the child outside the UK and agreeing to the child’s emigration, should the issue arise
  • being responsible for the child’s property
  • appointing a guardian for the child, if necessary
  • allowing confidential information about the child to be disclosed
For all you parents out there, you have the right to a say in all the above issues. If you can’t agree, then ultimately it is a matter for a Court to decide.
In the meantime, I’ve asked for my diabetic son to have counseling by the diabetic child psychologist who has previously counseled  our son for his psychological and emotional problems he suffers with whilst coping with his diabetes (he’s only 8, bless him and has had it since he was 2). He is being teased about his diabetes at school and has told me that he hates his illness and just wants “2 days without having diabetes mummy”. He has become very resentful about the fact that he is only 1 of a very small percent of children who get it and is annoyed that he has had the bad luck of getting it.
It is my son’s rights as a human being to have the medical treatment that he wants and needs. He has asked for psychological help, so who has the final say? If it is the parent’s over the voice of their child, is that acceptable? Can the parents simply override his human rights to medical treatment? I will have to look into the United Nations Convention on the rights of children.
My ex has now told the diabetes team that he will not consent to our son receiving this counseling but hasn’t given any reasons why.
I am now going to have to fight yet another little battle in this ongoing tranche of autocratic behaviour on his part…….

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You’re currently reading “Medical treatment - which parent can decide?,” an entry on Kids Need Mums

Published:
7.4.08 / 10am
Category:
Child Custody, Childrens Act, DirectGov, Family Law, Human Rights Act 1998, Mothers Rights, Parenting help, Shared Residency, psychologist
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