I just came across this piece which is a letter written to the Financial times. Makes for interesting reading given that people who are suffering with an unpleasant and unpredictable boss put it down to a variety of causes including Bipolar, drugs, personality, environment, culture etc. Great to read all the different perceptions….
http://blogs.ft.com/dearlucy/2007/07/i-think-my-bosshtml/
‘I think my boss may be bipolar’
July 10, 2007
I think my boss may be bipolar. He has two different modies: he’s either charging round, full of energy, making bold decisions or he’s paranoid, negative and bullying. In the “up” moods he’s stimulating, though it’s exhausting trying to keep up. The rest of the time he is paranoid and hostile. I’ve worked for him for two years and though I admire his talent and charisma I find his mood swings increasingly stressful. A couple of weeks ago I tried to broach the matter, but he looked as if he was about to have a coronary, so I shut up. Is there anything I can do? And if not, how can I insulate myself from the worst of his rages?
Investment banker, male, 36
July 10th, 2007 in Uncategorised | Permalink
19 Responses to “‘I think my boss may be bipolar’”
Comments
They say people join companies and leave managers – it is quite true. I am a victim of a similar situation, and the only way I have managed to survive is by telling myself that you cannot change a person – especially your boss – you can only change your reaction to him. Try being objective, impersonal, and to-the-point. Maintain a steady unfluctuating disposition, that should lessen the blow of the mood swings. But if despite all this you feel you cant be happy working this way, the world is big and it is full of opportunities
Posted by: Anonymous | July 10th, 2007 at 2:53 pm | Report this comment
I had a boss who was very similar – she ended up driving me into depression. The situation may not get any better and this can have an impact on you.
The lack of rationality that you have to cope with can put enough mental pressure on you that it causes you to question your judgement and eventually you follow the mood swings.
That’s good for no-one.
It’s also worth condsidering your boss may have a drugs problem, this can have similar effects to mental illness.
Posted by: Aaron | July 10th, 2007 at 4:34 pm | Report this comment
If your boss is really bipolar then he will exhibit those two different modes when dealing with senior colleagues and potential clients, as well as when dealing with a junior colleague. It doesn’t seem very likely that he would have lasted even two years in his job if he were paranoid and hostile with clients and his boss. It is perhaps more likely that he suffers from “kicking the dog” syndrome, bouts of which could be triggered by business disappointments. You are working in a deal driven organisation. Every mandate won or lost, every issue floated or pulled and every time that market prices do or don’t perform near expectations affect reputations, remuneration and prospects. Every potential deal is a one-off opportunity from which to wring every penny of fees and every nuance of status and ranking. It is not an environment where anyone is likely to appreciate a good loser so either be just as bad a loser as your boss or try to move to a longer term client relationship position.
Posted by: Ironybrew, 57, Retired, Male | July 10th, 2007 at 5:15 pm | Report this comment
Insight meditation is the answer. I used to have an extremely nasty boss – the owner of a small company who would appear charming and charismatic to potential clients, yet would treat his employees with total contempt.
Insight meditation (vipassana meditation) is a practice that literally changes the way your brain functions so as you are no longer hurt or upset by the actions of others. The practice takes a couple of months until you see a clear benefit, but trust me, it really works.
Not only are you better able to deal with difficult people, you will also increase your concentration by a huge amount and therefore perform better at work, and enjoy your life more overall.
You will find over the course of a few months that everyday life becomes increasingly pleasurable as you become more open to experience and less reactive to changing moods.
The power it gives you to sit calmly smiling whilst some ego-maniac shouts at you, and see them unable to understand why you are totally unaffected by them is reason enough to do it, but actually, the greater strength will come from not even needing to.
Posted by: Anonymous | July 11th, 2007 at 10:00 am | Report this comment
I’m in a similar position, and I find that the manager’s moods are affecting me in a very negative way. In fact, his behavior is making me depressed and that is spilling over into my family life. My family and friends are highly aware of the change in me, as well as the cause, and they have urged me to quit the job in order to be away from this negative influence. I’m in the process of doing that right now, as there is no way to change that person or to tolerate his abusive persona much longer.
Posted by: Fed Up | July 11th, 2007 at 3:51 pm | Report this comment
It’s not your responsibility to change your boss, except in the sense of finding a new one! Let the market decide the fate of dysfunctional supervisors…
Posted by: Vince Woodward | July 11th, 2007 at 6:32 pm | Report this comment
Sounds like a coke problem to me. Bipolar people aren’t paranoid and bullying in their down phases – they’re usually apathetic and totally non-functional. Take comfort by confiding in your colleagues – you can gain strength by having a laugh behind his back. Also be secure in the knowledge that in a couple more years he’ll crash and burn in a blaze of septum-ruptured glory – leaving you, the survivor, to the spoils.
Posted by: Female, PR, 25 | July 12th, 2007 at 8:19 am | Report this comment
Do we have the same boss? My tuppence worth from the City trenches: try to keep out of his way, try only to report success and watch the sits-vac ads.
Posted by: Craigoh | July 12th, 2007 at 12:36 pm | Report this comment
I have also been in this situation – only afterwards did we realise it was cocaine abuse.
I gave away so much of my internal energy to a complete idiot – never again. I would now instantly switch off and cease to care if someone attempted to treat me like that.
Try alerting whoever is ultimately in charge to what is going on and that it may be drug-related.
Posted by: Lulu | July 12th, 2007 at 1:11 pm | Report this comment
Worse if the boss is a woman. There are so many dysfunctional people in the City these days, that it is almost impossible to find the normal ones among us.
The best remedy is to find a new job and leave that “boss” to rot in his own mess…unless of course, you are a certified psychiatrist.
Posted by: Connie | July 12th, 2007 at 1:51 pm | Report this comment
In my experience you may wish to consider notifying HR or go to Occupational Health. Don’t sit back and do nothing
This is more and more common in the city. Drugs and stress play a part in many cases.
Your boss may want to consider an assesment at Life Works , a treatment facility in Duke Street that runs an Intensive Evening Program for Impaired Professionals. I know Professionals who have had their lives turned around by this course.
Life Works is now regarded as the best treatment facility of its kind in the UK for getting high achievers back on the path.
They also have a residential facility in Surrey that is very highly regarded.
Posted by: Marco | July 12th, 2007 at 2:28 pm | Report this comment
It is not just confined to the City. I experienced something similar in the public sector. It wasn’t drugs – my female boss simply had appalling inter-personal skills. Eventually (after I had left, her behaviour being a principle reason) she was moved to a different position where she wasn’t allowed to manage anyone. If you are confident your HR department will respond in an impartial manner, I’d speak to them.
Posted by: Kate | July 12th, 2007 at 4:22 pm | Report this comment
I had a similar situation with two male bosses simultaneously. The most senior of the two was an unfortunate combination of huge ego and massive insecurity; and was a divisive bully. It was so obvious to all members of my team, that our way of handling this was to bond over our derision and simply tolerate him.
The second of the two was my immediate boss and not as conspicuous. He was aggressive, and frequently phoned me out of hours or when I was on holiday to shout abuse at me because something hadn’t gone to plan, or he’d made a mistake and was seeking to pass blame. Just as my confidence was hitting rock bottom and I was thinking about quitting, I was headhunted and snapped up a much better offer at a better company. In my exit interview, I gave HR a no-holds-barred account of their behaviour. Shortly after I left, I bumped into my ex-immediate boss at a social event. He told me he was in AA and apologised for his treatment of me.
I agree with the comments already posted; it sounds as if your boss has a problem with substance abuse, or at least needs to seek help for a mental health issue. Speak to HR and keep your eye on the job market. Life is too short to tread on eggshells because of your boss’s inability to address his personal problems.
Posted by: Emma | July 12th, 2007 at 5:26 pm | Report this comment
I am battling the same issue. My boss is at least open minded enough that I have discussed the problem with her – which helped.
She blames the mood swings on a physical illness she suffers with, I am sure that is true to an extent but is not a full explanation.
I manage the problem by: (1) just accepting that her poor interpersonal skills mean mean she will never really understand why her unpredictable moods are a problem for us; and (2) in my head she lives in a ‘box’ and I only allow her out of that box in office hours – this has stopped me stressing about her out of office hours so makes the problem manageable. Interestingly this method was given to me by her boss who faces the same problem with her!
John, Banker
Posted by: John | July 14th, 2007 at 1:20 pm | Report this comment
I had a boss like this once. We observed that on days when he was rushed and grabbed a few donuts and coffee from the catering cart, he was nasty as a bear, but on days when he’d had breakfast at home, he was the kindest, smartest boss one could have. After charting this for a couple of weeks, we asked him if he might perhaps have a blood sugar problem. It turned out that he was diabetic! With diet, exercise and insulin, he’s much more even-keeled most times.
Posted by: Jean Mansen | July 16th, 2007 at 6:24 am | Report this comment
Dear Lucy
My problem concerns a columnist on my daily newspaper. She is really funny and sends everything up very cleverly. But a couple of weeks ago, she started referring to people who behave strangely as “nutters”. I think this is a very unkind and dismissive way to talk about people who struggle courageously with bipolar disorder and/or mental illness. I’m worried that if I tell her what I think, she’ll dismiss me as politically correct or a member of the green ink brigade. I’m worried that she’ll start calling people poofs or darkies next. What should I do?
Yours sincerely
HR Consultant (I know! I know!)
Female 59
Posted by: Sally Phillips | August 3rd, 2007 at 9:16 am | Report this comment
I strongly suggest you leave your boss as quickly as possible. I worked for someone like that, too. The best thing he ever did was tell me that I’d been declared redundant. I left him have never looked back.
Seriously, life is far too short to work for a boss like yours. I’m sure you have enough to worry about and complete every day. The last thing you need is a boss suffering from a neurosis you cannot control — and he won’t either.
Posted by: Doug | August 10th, 2007 at 3:53 pm | Report this comment
This sounds very familiar. I’m in a similar situation, and having always wondered why people got sick leave for “stress” (being a strong-minded individual) I now understand completely as I’m hating my own boss (who sounds like yours) and only staying here till I find something else. However, this might not be the best time to be looking for a job as an investment banker! Good luck – you’ll never change him, though, so unless you can somehow get rid of him you’ll have to put up with it or leave.
Posted by: analyst, female, 32 | August 14th, 2007 at 9:58 am | Report this comment
I just quit a job like yours. My boss has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder for 20+ yrs. I believe he uses his illness as a crutch for saying and doing whatever he feels at the time. He forgets half of what he says, he expects me to find his lost items and makes false accusations consistently. I know he drinks alcohol on occassion and doesn’t always take his meds. He doesn’t hesitate to ask if someone wore their stupid hat that day. One time I thought he was going to hit our receptionist. When he is up, he’s fun and full of spunk, when he’s down, he doesn’t care who’s way he get’s in. I’ve even heard him “yell” at his banker for using the work “closing” rather than the word “refinance”. He utilized my time for “lectures” and got mad when the work didn’t get done. I will never accept another position of this nature. I ended up on Paxil while I was there just to cope, my doctor advised I quit working for this man, which I eventually did.
US Court ruling “Bipolar Disorder is physical disorder and not a mental illness” :
Implications for discrimination by insurers against mental health problem
(Article from Equilibrium website) http://www.bipolar-foundation.org/index.aspx?o=1354
This case revolves around the increasing and incontrovertible evidence from various areas of research that bipolar disorder is not ‘merely’ a ‘psychological disorder
It has reluctantly been accepted by individuals suffering from bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness) and other mental health disorders that they face problems with regard to insurance of all types. Life insurance, personal income insurance and motor insurance are all affected by history of pre-existing ill health of any type but some policies specifically exclude cover for the de-novo development of ‘mental illness’ during the term of the policy, treating it differently from ‘physical disorders”, as well as imposing larger premiums or imposing other limitations on people with known mental health problems.
A court ruling on this issue in the US which is of considerable significance in this area has not been picked up at all by the popular media or the professional literature either within or outside of the US. Although not of direct legal impact outside of the US, we believe this case raises important issues about the way both employers and insurers deal with claims arising from the development of mental health problems. It also raises more general issues regarding differential stigma of ‘mental’ versus ‘physical’ ill health. This case revolves around the increasing and incontrovertible evidence from various areas of research that bipolar disorder is not ‘merely’ a ‘psychological disorder’.
The Case: Fitts v. Fannie Mae[1]
The ruling by the United States District Court for the District of Columbia involves an employee of a major mortgage company who developed bipolar disorder and whose employee disability insurance provider stopped paying disability benefits after 24 months on the grounds of bipolar disorder being a ‘mental illness’. The policy provided cover until the age of 65 for physical disability. Ms. Fitts had worked for the company for 13 years before she was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 1995. The employee- Ms. Jane Fitts, successfully brought a case against both the employer and the insurer arguing that bipolar disorder did not clearly fall in the category “mental, emotional or nervous diseases or disorders of any type”. The court awarded “prejudgment interest on all sums due her and the costs of this action “.
Three pieces of evidence were presented to back this argument, and two expert witnesses, including Miss. Fitts’ own psychiatrist, provided evidence:
1. Ms. Fitts’ father and brother showed symptoms of the disorder and so a hereditary predisposition coupled with having the disorder showed the genetic nature of the disorder, which must therefore have a physical basis.
2. Brain scans of Ms. Fitts showed excessive age-controlled atrophy of the left parietal lobe and abnormal wave activity on the left side of the brain.
3. Ms. Fitts suffered from physical symptoms such as headaches, chest pains, and insomnia that were ascribed to bipolar disorder.
Prof. Frederick T. Goodwin from the George Washington School of Medicine stated: “bipolar disorder is a physical illness because it is a neurobiological disorder that affects the physical and chemical structure of the brain”. He supported the claims listed above, also making the point that susceptibility to pharmacological therapy suggest a physical cause. Ms.Fitts’ psychiatrist maintained that while the clinical features of the disorder are mainly behavioural and emotional, they are due to physical changes in the brain.
Ms.Fitts’ psychiatrist maintained that while the clinical features of the disorder are mainly behavioural and emotional, they are due to physical changes in the brain.
The defence team argued that bipolar disorder clearly falls within the “mental illness” category because previous judgments had ruled it to be such on the manifestation of the symptoms and because it appears in DSM-IV.
This case was an appeal on a previous judgement against Ms. Fitts’s claim. The first filing of the suit focussed on violation of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) and the District of Columbia Human Rights Act (DCHRA), and breached certain contractual and common law duties. This court dismissed all of Ms. Fitts’ claims except her Employment Retirement Income Security Act (ERISA) claim. ERISA requires all policies to be written in unambiguous language and given that bipolar disorder did not clearly fall within the definition of mental illness in the insurance policy, the court was bound by the doctrine of contra preferentem, which has been applied as federal common law to ERISA. The doctrine states that in ambiguous definitions the ruling should be against the drafter of the contract.
Other cases
Another case ongoing in North America illustrates the unfortunate consequences of stigmatisation of bipolar disorder leading to an understandable reluctance by those affected to openly disclose to employers a history of pre-existing mental illness. The Canadian insurers of the television series The Dead Zone filed a suit against star Anthony Michael Hall to recoup more than $612,000 for failure to disclose he suffered from bipolar disorder, AP reports. The suit claimed production of the series, shot in Vancouver, was halted from May to August 2001 when Hall was treated for “bipolar affective disorder depression with psychotic features” for which the production company submitted a claim and received money. The case is waiting to be heard at The Supreme Court of British Columbia. (Source: Vancouver Sun)
In a case in New York, which does not have parity legislation, a court ruled that a disability insurance policy is not discriminatory because it provided only 24 months of cover for disability due to unipolar depression, rather than cover to the age of 65 years as it would have done for disability due to physical injury. The appellant, a Charlene Polon, continued to suffer with unipolar depression and has not been able to claim disability allowance under her policy from 1996. The case was made under the Insurance Law, and the court ruled that the law only protected from discrimination “with regard to her eligibility for and access to insurance” and not within the terms of the policy[2]. This case demonstrates that many instances of discrimination continue to occur and that even the covering statutes are unclear
For the rest of the article, follow this link:http://www.bipolar-foundation.org/index.aspx?o=1354
Research shows that people with mental health illnesses are more likely to be the victims of violence than the general population. (Graham Thornicroft – Shunned). One study showed that people with mental illness were two and a half times more likely to be the victims of violent crime than the general population (8.2% compared to 3.1%). There are many, many studies trying to determine which category of people are most likely to be violent and these studies vary in their conclusions. The role of alcohol or drug use appears to be a stronger predictor for violence than does having a diagnosis of a severe mental illness. As Prof Thornicroft points out, there aren’t studies of the prevalence of violence amonst “the physically ill”….
However, there are many studies which point to the prevalence of domestic violence perpetrated against the mentally ill. Some might say that living with a person with a mental health problem “causes” them to become angry/frustrated/fed up with the sufferer and that they are “pushed” into becoming violent towards them or that they are “defending” themselves against the mentally ill person’s “attack” (verbal or physical). The huge problem with domestic violence is seeing through the issue of “who started it” much like a parent has to see through which child hit the other first or which child started the argument. What is obvious, however, (and supported by a lot of research) is that many sufferers of depression and anxiety have such low self esteem that it is very easy for them to become victims of bullying, intimidation, harrassment, ill-treatment etc as they find it very difficult to stand up for themselves or to believe in themselves sufficiently well to be assertive with those around them. People with mental ill health are often told that they have “lost their reason or judgement” and they therefore doubt themselves when their spouse is telling them that they are wrong/stupid/unreasonable/selfish/uncaring/lazy/irresponsible etc etc. They lack the certainty that their own perceptions and judgements are correct as they are constantly reminded that they are “ill”. This makes it very easy for an abuser to get to the core of their victim and succesfully abuse them, hold power over them and undermine them to the point of cruelty. The “mind games” that a spouse can play over their mentally ill partner can be devastating.
This has been my own experience. My ex husband played with my mind in exactly this manner. I now see this and can compare it directly with my experience with my partner of the last 3 years. My partner plays none of these games, nor does he try and control, manipulate, bully or abuse me in any way. I am fortunate enough to have formed such a close bond with another person to enable me to make these comparisons.
Researching the link between mental ill health and domestic violence has been hugely helpful to me in making my recovery. I can distinguish between those behaviours of mine which were destructive and those behaviours which resulted from being abused by my ex husband. Reading the profiles of an abuser helps to recognise a pattern of behaviour or dynamic in a domestic violence relationship. As a result, a person can disentangle those behaviours which are attributable to their own personality and those which resulted from being abused.
One such piece of research is an article from Mr Lundy Bancroft. This article rings so true for me as it is so close to the truth of my own experience. I have highlighted in bold those sentences which are exactly like my ex spouses behaviour. Read the entire article by clicking on the following link or by visiting the Justice for Mothers website:
Here is an except from Mr. Bancroft’s article:
An abuser’s desire for control intensifies as he senses the relationship slipping way from him. He focuses on the debt he feels his victim owes him, and his outrage at her growing independence. (This dynamic is often misread as evidence that batterers have an inordinate “fear of abandonment.”) He is likely to increase his level of intimidation and manipulation at this point; he may, for example, promise to change while simultaneously frightening his victim, including using threats to take custody of the children legally or by kidnapping. Those abusers who accept the end of the relationship can still be dangerous to their victims and children, because of their determination to maintain control over their children and to punish their victims for perceived transgressions. They are also, as we will see later, much more likely than non-batterers to be abusive physically, sexually, and psychologically to their children.
The propensity of a batterer to see his partner as a personal possession commonly extends to his children, helping to explain the overlap between battering and child abuse. He tends, for example, to have an exaggerated reaction when his ex-partner begins a new relationship, refusing to accept that a new man is going to develop a bond with “his” children; this theme is a common one in batterer groups. (Marie: My ex took out a Prohibited Steps Order against my new partner claiming that he was a danger to my children simply becuase he suffered from Bipolar too). He may threaten or attack the new partner, make unfounded accusations that the new partner is abusing the children, (Marie: there were numerous threatening letters sent to my new partner accusing him of all kinds of behaviour), cut off child support, or file abruptly for custody in order to protect his sole province over his children.
A batterer who does file for custody will frequently win, as he has numerous advantages over his partner in custody litigation. These include, 1) his typical ability to afford better representation (often while simultaneously insisting that he has no money with which to pay child support), (Marie: my ex spent earns over £450k pa but maintains that he cannot afford to pay maintenance to me). 2) his marked advantage over his victim in psychological testing, since she is the one who has been traumatized by the abuse, 3) his ability to manipulate custody evaluators to be sympathetic to him, and 4) his ability to manipulate and intimidate the children regarding their statements to the custody evaluator.
There is also evidence that gender bias in family courts works to the batterer’s advantage. (Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court Gender Bias Study) Even if the batterer does not win custody, his attempt can be among the most intimidating acts possible from the victim’s perspective, and can lead to financial ruin for her and her children.
I am still living in my brother’s spare room, 18 months after being ordered to leave the matrimonial home whilst he remains in our 7 bedroomed house. This means that the children’s home with me is still my brother’s spare room where we all share a bed. I have no car of my own ( I have to borrow my boyfriend’s) whilst he has just bought a new BMW people carrier. I have been awarded 12% of his income whilst he keeps the rest. I am over £450k in debt.
Would this happen if I were not “mentally ill”? If I had been strong enough to stand up for myself, and/or didn’t have a set of medical records and a condition that would be used against me in court, would I be in the situation I’m in? I don’t think so. Many of my readers have given similar accounts of how they have been abused by their spouses due to their own lack of self esteem arising from their mental health problems. There are many articles, comments, forum chats where people have said the same thing ie that they have been abused by their partners because they have suffered from a mental health problem which their spouse has used against them to take control, intimidate, manipulate and ultimately punish by taking their children away from them.
Any similar stories out there? Anyone who disagrees with this perception/research? As usual, any feedback gratefully received….
Private mental health clinic states rising demand for services from stressed out city types. How will the stress of these people get passed on to their families, especially their children? Does the stress “fallout” from these people amount to the same kind of “fallout” from people who are already suffering from mental health problems and, if so, is their own parenting brought into question? I very much doubt it. Do they fall into a different category somehow because their symptoms are caused by external events rather than internal chemistry? Probably. People will see these people as sufferers of the financial crises and, rightly in my view, feel sorry for them as they face losing everything they’ve worked so hard to achieve. (I don’t personally subsrcribe to the seemingly widely-held view that these people deserve everything they’re getting because it was their own fault somehow for being “greedy”. You simply cannot tar them all with the same brush.) Whatever your view on whether they deserve to lose out or not, their children don’t deserve to have this visited on them yet they will often bear the brunt of the fallout whilst they feel the strain and stress at home.
Yet, I think it highly unlikely that social services or CAFCASS or any judge would hold that these people are “incapable” of looking after their children as a result of any depression or anxiety resulting from these job losses. This depression and anxiety is likely to be looked on sympathetically by those people in total contrast to how they would perceive someone with a mental health diagnosis such as Bipolar who suffers from the same level of depression and anxiety. Would this then be discrimination?
Is this fair? What do you think is the difference between the effect of a depressive illness brought on by job loss compared to a depressive episode in Bipolar? Should they be treated as resulting in an inability to parent their children? If not, why not? If so, why? Your views and perceptions would be gratefully received.
Link: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2008/oct/08/mental.health.financial.crisis
The text of the Guardian Article:
An independent mental health hospital located near London’s banking district has identified a new disorder sweeping through the devastated ranks of City bankers and hedge fund managers.
The clinic says it is seeing more and more cases of “square mile syndrome”, a term it is using to describe stress-related mental health problems faced by City workers as the credit crunch chews through the financial sector, leaving a trail of redundancies in its wake.
Capio Nightingale Hospital, a private clinic, says it has witnessed a 33% increase in the number of City workers seeking advice for anxiety, depression and stress since July, and a 30% rise in patients seeking help for drugs and alcohol addiction – often the result, says the clinic’s medical director, of recreational drug use tipping into full-blown dependence during times of stress. There has also been a 27% rise in inquiries about its eating disorders programmes.
“We’re seeing 25-year-old bankers waking up with acute anxiety and stress, and realising that the job they thought they had for life and the bonuses they had come to rely on had literally disappeared overnight,” says Capio Nightingale’s medical director, William Shanahan, who is quick to point out that “square mile syndrome” is not a medical or diagnostic definition.
“Hopefully, we can encourage more people to come and get help,” he says. “We can draw worrying comparisons with the Black Wednesday days of the 1990s, when we saw a sudden spike in the number of City workers who suffered mental health problems after the bottom fell out of the market. We want to try to avoid this happening again.”
Shanahan says there is still not enough recognition of the mental health problems faced by employees in high-pressure jobs. The clinic is offering a deal where patients who can produce a P45 issued after September 1 can pay for their treatment once they find work.
“Things have got better, but there can be a reluctance to admit you have a problem when you’re in a high-flying job where you are expected to deal with stress day after day,” Shanahan says. “If we don’t watch out, square mile syndrome could be a timebomb.”
On World Mental Health Day 2008 the latest research* we have commissioned reveals that a staggering 49.3% of us wouldn’t feel happy to disclose a mental health condition such as depression at work, rising to almost 54% amongst manual unskilled workers.
The research found that only 18.3% of people would reveal a mental health condition to their HR department, however, 34% of people would discuss their condition with their line manager. Younger workers (16 – 24 year olds) and older workers (over 55’s) were least likely to be happy to discuss their mental health conditions. With 57% of younger workers saying they would not discuss it at all and only 12% of over 55’s saying they would be happy to talk to their HR department.
Respondents from Edinburgh and Leeds were least happy to discuss their mental health at all (67% and 63% respectively). 39% of the respondents from Edinburgh cited shame and embarrassment as their main reason for not wanting to disclose a mental health condition, whereas, 26% of respondents from Leeds cited fears that their employers would not be sympathetic as the reason for not feeling happy to discuss their mental health.
“Despite the office of National Statistics estimate that one in six people may experience a mental health condition at any one time, our research illustrates that people are still very reluctant to reveal their conditions and show any signs of perceived weakness.
However, we know from our work that people with mental health conditions are perfectly capable of managing a job and their condition with the right support from their employers and therefore feel it is vital that such misconceptions are laid to rest”.
Tim Cooper, Managing Director, Shaw Trust
The stigma attached to mental ill health was more of a concern than the fear of possibly hampering career progression among 25 – 44 year olds, with 37% of people in this age group citing shame as their main reason for not feeling happy to talk about a mental health condition.
Those respondents in graduate entry level jobs were the most confident that a mental health condition does not affect their ability to do their jobs, with 29% of the people in this group citing this as the main reason they wouldn’t discuss their mental health.
Respondents in professional sales, media and marketing were most concerned amongst all industry sectors about being treated differently if they were to disclose their mental health condition (31%) compared to just 4% of people within the professional finance industry who cited this as a concern.
Professional Finance also came out at the biggest industry group to cite that a mental health condition didn’t affect their ability to do their jobs as their main reason for not wishing to discuss it.
Overall 54% of people felt that they would receive more support at work for a physical disability than a mental health condition (rising to 58 % amongst the senior Manager / Professional group) compared to only 6.9% who believed they would receive more support for a mental health condition.
” People have become more comfortable talking about physical illnesses over the years, however, there is still a huge stigma associated with having a mental health condition. Dealing with such a problem often leaves people feeling awkward and a culture of secrecy seems to have emerged in which people are frightened to confide in others”.
Professor Cary L Cooper, CBE, Professor of Organisational Psychology and Health at Lancaster University
“There is a clear need for more structure and education on how to support employees with mental health issues, businesses need to create an environment in which people not only feel confident enough to discuss a mental health condition with a line manager or member of the HR team but in which they can also receive the support they need to continue making a valuable contribution. We see the effect that being out of work and coping with a mental health condition can have on people’s lives and we are urging employers to use this website to find out how to make a difference in the workplace”.
Tim Cooper, Managing Director, Shaw Trust
*All figures unless otherwise stated are from a Tickbox survey. Total sample size was 1070 workers. Fieldwork was undertaken between 18th – 24th September 2008. The survey was carried out online.
Alasdair Campbell told Tony Blair that he suffered from repeated bouts of depression and had had a drink problem. Blair had responded “I’m not worried if you’re not worried”. Campbell had had a breakdown, had taken to drink and had suffered from severe depression. Yet the Prime Minister asked him to work for him. Regardless of whether you think Alasdair did a good job or not, it says a great deal about Blair that he is willing to encourage Campbell to take on the role that he did.
Or does it? It is highly likely that Blair already knew that a relatively high proportion of MPs suffer with mental health difficulties and he was simply accepting of the fact. According to research, published on the Stand to Reason website, One in Five MPs experience mental ill health and are forced to hide their problems…..http://www.standtoreason.org.uk/goals
The report published on 16 July 2008 by Stand to Reason in conjunction with the All Party Parliamentary Group on Mental Health, with support from the Royal College of Psychiatrists, Mind and Rethink has shown that one in five MPs surveyed has experience of a mental health problem but fears disclosing this because of the stigma and discrimination associated with mental health issues.
An anonymous questionnaire completed by 94 MPs, 100 Lords and 151 parliamentary staff has revealed that:
- 19% of MPs had personal experience of a mental health problem (17% of Peers, 45% of staff)
- 94% had family or friends who have experienced a mental health problem
- 86% of MPs said their job was stressful
- 1 in 3 said work-based stigma and the expectation of a hostile reaction from the media and public prevented them from being open about mental health issues.
The report shows that despite significant numbers of people working in Parliament experiencing mental distress, over half of MPs did not think they had sufficient understanding of the Disability Discrimination Act to make reasonable adjustments for a staff member with mental health problems and only 17% had received any mental health awareness training.
President of the Royal College of Psychiatrists Dinesh Bhugra said: “Sadly, stigma is still widely prevalent. Mental illness comes in many forms across the age span, and is everyone’s business. Mental health and physical health cannot be parted. We applaud this effort to start talking more openly about mental illness. MPs occupy a privileged position in the public eye, and greater openness has the potential to lead to a better public understanding of mental health issues.”
I am strangely comforted by the high number of MPs who have or are suffering from mental health problems as it gives me hope that they may be prepared to challenge the legislation and case law governing custody issues where a parent suffers from a mental health problems as presumably, some of these MPs are parents themselves. If the legislation was handed over to them to change, where would they draw the line in terms of assessing someone’s ability to parent? If changes to legislation were handed over to those within Parliament and the legislature who had direct experience of mental health, I wonder how they would chose to re-draft or re-frame some of the legislation governing mental health issues. If their own parenting was being scrutinised with the threat of their own children being taken away from them due to their mental health problems, would they seek to re-draft the legislation?
My guess is that they probably would. My next piece of research is going to be to try and find out some more about who these MPs are and whether or not they have children. I wonder how many of these MPs may have been diagnosed with Bipolar rather than depression. I think I shall attempt to find out the same with the Judiciary. However, I know that people with mental health problems are not permitted to be magistrates, so I now need to determine whether Judges can be Judges if they have mental health problems. If MPs have to step down having been sectioned, I wonder if the Judiciary have to too? If there are MPs and Judges who have retained custody of their children and yet suffer with a mental health problem, it begs the question of the test that is being applied to determine who is a “fit” parent and who isn’t. I’m sure there must be some method in their madness…..I just need to establish what it is….
For the relevant articles, see the links below:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/7508128.stm
My daughter showed her chronic shyness yesterday, which I believe is a manifestation of the affect my absence is having on her and the ongoing lack of insight of her that my ex has. Her views and opinions are often ignored by him – something that I have both experienced when I’m with her and him, as well as being recounted by her on numerous occasions which she relates graphically and with a depth of feeling that is manifest in her lack of self esteem and anxiety. Yesterday was a case in point. She was being shown around her prospective new school by children who were barely older than herself yet she could not communicate with them. She clung on to me throughout, despite being with both me and her father, largely ignoring him and not once taking his hand. This is striking behaviour given that she has been largely in his care now for the past 18 months. She is now over 10, but behaved more like a terrified toddler hiding behind her mother’s skirt, than a confident child about to enter her teens. She would not step into any of the classrooms on her own – she clung on to my arm and pulled me into them with her, burying her head into my shoulder as much as she could. She asked questions of me, quietly, so that nobody else could hear and would not look at any of the other children in the eye. Even when were being shown around the art room where she saw the pottery and the art class of pottery skills led by a cheerful, friendly, bright young female teacher, she could not bring herself to share her own enthusiasm for the activity she loves most. Instead, I had to ask the questions for her. Very ocasionally she spoke to others but it was with a manifest lack of confidence.
She has always been a relatively shy child but this has been attributed by her father as being the effect that my continuing presence, my Bipolar and my fundamental personality has had in the children’s lives when I was the caregiver. Now that he has been the main carer for the past 18 months, her shyness with others has increased, not decreased as he asserted in court. If he was the right person for her to live with, then why should this state that she is in have continued? It is clear to me: he cannot relate to her in the way she needs him to. He has a fundamental lack of understanding and empathy with my daughter’s shyness and high levels of sensitivity as her behaviour is so alien to his own. Her high levels of sensitivty both to the affects of her environment on herand to her interaction with others is very similar to my own and I therefore have an inherent empathy and sympathy with this trait of hers. He however has no experience of feeling like this and has not shown any willingness to accomodate this – rather he prefers to tell her that she “is being over-sensitive” or “over-reacting” or “imagining” certain experiences that she has. He dismisses her perceptions of her world to such an extent that she is now highly reticent to assert herself with him. I observe all this and feel helpless as I am not there to help her respect her own feelings and teach her assertiveness. Only having small amounts of time with her doesn’t support the kind of understanding and nurturing she needs to help her validate herself.
Most mothers fundamentally know their child and have an inherent understanding of their fundamental personality and nature. Of course their are exceptions, but it is widely acknowledged by most people that this is the mother’s natural ability and is the result of the close bond that a mother and child have. The net result of this lack of a mother’s input – a mother who fundamentally understands her child – is to produce a child lacking in self esteem, a child who no longer trusts their feelings and instints when their main carer (my ex and his nanny) ignores, dismisses and makes light of their experiences. When I try to teach them how to stand up to him, they tell me that they are “too frightened” of him and his anger and that “he doesn’t listen” even when they do try to tell him their feelings.
An example is that my son was told off by his nanny for being naughty when he ate some crisps and hadn’t restrained his friends from eating them too. The fact that he was having a hypo and therefore could barely function, let alone take his friends to task, was not recognised by the nanny at all. Unsurprisingly, he felt misunderstood, resentful and mistreated. Her lack of understanding of his nature and her lack of experience of his condition has a profound affect on him. He grows increasingly resentful of the limits she places on him with regard to managing his diabetes, with the result that he is now angry about his condition and feels that he is not having the support from her that he needs. This is in stark contrast to how he feels when he is with me, as he knows that I understand his feelings and respect them.
I know these things that my children are relating to me to be true as I experienced my ex husband’s reaction to me over many years when I tried to explain to him my own feelings about the world and the people I interacted with. His usual response was that I was “over-reacting”, was “far too sensitive”, that I “imagined it” and that it was my attitude, personality and behaviour that provoked any conflict with others rather than attributing any behaviour on other people;s part to any difficulties I may be experiencing.
When someone is told this time and time again, it knocks their self esteem and devalues their experiences resulting in lack of trust of their own perceptions. Over time, it is an extremely toxic experience which ultimately can lead to severe anxieties and depression due to the lack of ability to follow through on their need to assert their wishes, needs and feelings.
This is exactly what is happening to my eldest daughter and is beginning to happen to my son too who is also telling me that he is frightened of his father and therefore can’t tell him how he truly feels.
I cannot bear watching all this happening and having to stand on the side-lines unable to intervene to support what they are saying and feeling other than when they are being looked after by me. Given that they are with me so rarely, I cannot provide the validation that they need on a regular basis. This is resulting in my children becoming increasingly uncertain of their interactions with others and a lack of ability to assert themselves in challenging situations.
This is highly damaging to them and, in my view, is causing the “significant harm” that the law refers to in the Children’s Act.
Proving it as a causation, however, is fraught with difficulties as proving a link between his attitude and behaviour to them as being the main cause of these problems is still in debate in the on-going “nature versus nurture” debate. What is certain though is that a child’s personality which is a mixture of both parents, needs to be understood and nurtured by the parent who’s personality best matches that of the child. Certainly, in my eldest daughters case, her personality is much more like mine and she would benefit far more from being with someone who understands her than with someone who doesn’t.
How do I prove this? Ultimately, it will be her choice that counts. By that time, however, she may be so full of self-doubt that her ability to make that choice will be greatly hampered as she may no longer trust her own feelings. Only time will tell…..
I woke up crying from a dream I had last night. The tears started during my dream: my dream-self was crying and as I woke up, I was still crying.
I had dreamt that I had become a ghost. My ghost-self was able to be anywhere that my children were – it felt wonderful. If they were asleep in their room, I could sit on the end of the bed and just watch them sleeping. If they were sitting quietly reading a book, I could sit next to them mouthing the words alongside them and watch the expressions changing on their faces when they read a funny piece or a puzzling piece or simply watch them becoming drawn into a fantasy world. A world where I was too. I could run outside and play with them, chasing after a ball or just cheering them on…
Nobody would notice, so nobody could stop me. No-one could tell me that I shouldn’t be near my children. I could spend all day and all night with them. If I was lucky, they might become aware of my presence in a positive way and just feel comforted that their mum was with them then they could sleep soundly, assured in the knowledge that my love was all around them even when I was not physically able to hold them and cuddle them.
No wonder I awoke crying…..it’s simply a dream and not a possibility…..
[Don't worry - I'm not suicidal. Far from it, I would never do that to my kids and I feel no reason to do it since making a full recovery]
I dread going to sleep nowadays. Most nights I dream about missing my children, about them being taken away, about them being in trouble and not being able to help them, about having to witness their tears and not be able to wipe them away, about them growing up without me, forgetting that they had a mum. I can only sleep with a sleeping tablet and then I still wake up fretting with a dread in my stomach and memories of the dreams I’ve had floating in and out in the early hours.
I never tell the children I have these dreams. When they tell me of their own bad nightmares, they tell of dreams of me having my head chopped off or about being eaten by a giant spider or about being kidnapped and me not coming to rescue them. My youngest wakes up scared that I really have had my head chopped off and is constantly scared that her dream will come true. She’s fretting about whether I’m safe and whether I will die. No matter how much reassurance I give her, she’s not convinced that I’m alright. She’s often telling me that she loves me “to the moon, and all the way around the universe and every atom in the universe!…..” but then goes on to ask how much I love her, seeking constant reassurance that I do.
My son is being teased at school for the fact that his mum doesn’t live with him; they tease him in front of other boys saying “your mum doesn’t live with you” in a taunt, repeating it until my son has to walk away. What does he tell them? How does he explain? He can’t; he simply has to walk away, hurting. No other boy in the whole school has a mother who doesn’t live with her son. He has to nurse that hurt on his own. Unlike other children with divorced parents who can share their hurt, he can’t; his family story is different from everyone else’s. It’s acceptable to have a father living away, but there is no other mother who is……How does he explain that even to himself, let alone to anyone else….
No wonder we are all having nightmares; it is a nightmare, whether you are awake or asleep and there is no end in sight….this is not a dream, but a harsh reality that my children and I are living in and we won’t wake up to find that it’s just a dream…..it’s horribly real.
September 2008: Edinburgh University is conducting a study of people who are related to someone with bipolar disorder and are between the ages of 16 and 23. The following lines give a description of what the study is for. Information sheets are available for download here
Bipolar disorder is a psychiatric disorder affecting approximately 1% of people at some point in their lives. The cause of the disorder is not known, although genetic factors are thought to play a large part and a few specific genes have also been discovered which appear to increase the risk in some studies. Unfortunately, we still don’t understand how these genes act upon the brain to make people more susceptable to illness. We hope to better understand these mechanisms by studying the relatives of people with the disorder.
Although most people who are related to someone with bipolar disorder will never develop the same illness, a few people will. We hope that by studying a large number of young relatives of people with the disorder, we might be able to predict who will become unwell later using a combination of scans, memory tests and a sample of blood for genetic testing. We are hoping to recruit the following groups of people:
- People age 16-23 with a mother, father, brother or sister with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, but with no history of psychiatric illness themselves.
- People age 16-23 with no close relatives with bipolar disorder and with no history of psychiatric illness themselves.
People who agree to take part will be assessed by a psychiatrist and a psychologist, receive a blood test for genetic testing and undergo a brain scan. The tests will be repeated again after 2 years. The information sheets explain the study in more detail and exactly what is involved. To download an information sheet click here. If you would like to take part after reading these, please contact us using the details at the bottom of this page.
If you are interested, you need to contact Dr Andrew McIntosh
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What is really annoying me about this whole Bipolar thing is that I might not even have the wretched illness!! For all I or anyone else knows, I could have been misdiagnosed. My friends and family and others who meet me are all still adamant that I don’t have the condition as I don’t exhibit any of the symptoms. Even my partner, who is himself Bipolar, does not think that I have the condition as I am “too well”.
This makes it very difficult to accept the fact that my children have been told that I am not capable of looking after them full time. If I don’t have this condition, then presumably I’m capable of looking after them. It would also clear my medical records enabling me to find work and drive without all the scrutiny that I am currently subjected to.
So, I’ve been doing some research about whether there are other tests available to prove or disprove the presence of any Bipolar condition that I may have. If I do have it, then it may indicate the severity or mildness of it. If I don’t have it, them I’m off back to court to challenge the decision.
The following paragraphs are based on various articles that I have read but I haven’t attributed them as they were wrong in places so I have edited them eg they state that “all Bipolar sufferers have extreme and severe mood shifts from mania to depression.” As you and I all know, that is simply not true for all of us sufferers who experience a very individual set of symptoms. Anyway, do read on….
Bipolar Disorder and the Brain
Bipolar disorder and the shifts in mood that come with it can ruin lives. It often goes unrecognized as an illness and people can suffer for years before it’s properly diagnosed and treated. Now, however, new research that analyzes the bipolar brain could lead to better diagnostic techniques and improved treatment. Recently researchers discovered that abnormalities in certain brain areas that govern emotion can occur in those with the ailment. These findings and others may eventually provide researchers with new tools to diagnose and treat the ailment earlier and more effectively.
More than 2 million Americans and around 1 million Britons have bipolar disorder and the shifts in mood that come with it. Those with the illness in its most severe form (Bipolar 1) can cycle between episodes of manic highs and severe depression that can damage relationships and job or school performance. Those with the less severe form (Bipolar 2) have fewer marked mood shifts but they too can benefit from treatment.
People with bipolar disorder can suffer for years before their illness is properly diagnosed and treated. This may soon change, however, thanks to new research that analyzes the bipolar brain. The findings are leading to a better understanding of the cause of bipolar disorder.The development of biology-based diagnostic techniques that could identify the disorder early and provide insights into how to improve treatment.Currently, bipolar disorder cannot be identified biologically with a simple blood test or brain scan. Instead, a diagnosis is made primarily on the basis of symptoms discussed in the doctor’s office. The disorder often goes unrecognized as an illness for years, but once diagnosed many people with bipolar disorder can be treated with medication. Commonly doctors prescribe drugs that stabilize mood, such as lithium, along with drugs that ease depression.To help speed detection and improve treatment, scientists recently began to scrutinize the bipolar brain and uncover biological signs of the disorder. Some research reveals abnormalities in areas that govern emotions. For example, techniques that imaged the brain indicated that emotional areas deep inside, known as the amygdala and hippocampus, can be smaller in both adolescents and adults with bipolar disorder. This suggests that brain changes are an early feature of the disorder. Other studies that examined brain anatomy and brain activity indicate that those with bipolar disorder can have abnormalities in areas toward the front of the brain that process emotions, including the orbitofrontal cortex and the anterior cingulate. In other work, researchers uncovered some early insight into the roots of these abnormalities by studying genes. Our genes guide the production of proteins that run brain development and function. One study found evidence that a variation of gene, known as BDNF, which produces a factor involved in the development of brain structures like the ones found to be abnormal in bipolar disorder, may increase a person’s risk of developing the illness. Researchers also are examining possible links to many other genes involved in cell survival and development. With continued study, this research may help scientists find ways to detect bipolar disorder earlier and intervene earlier. For example, researchers imagine that in the future they will be able to develop a simple brain scan that identifies suspect brain alterations or devise a blood test that signals that brain changes exist. And perhaps once the genes behind the disorder are clarified, a test could be developed to detect them early.The discoveries surrounding the biological contributors of bipolar disorder also highlight where to focus new treatment development and could help doctors modify existing therapy regimens to match an individual’s particular abnormality. In the end, the research may translate into more peaceful days and longer lives for many.
Research reveals that people with bipolar disorder can harbor abnormalities in brain areas that govern emotions, including the orbitofrontal cortex, which lies behind the eyes and aids complex emotional thinking. In one imaging study, researchers examined brain activity while people with bipolar disorder and healthy individuals conducted a task that tests thinking ability. In general, the activity in the area was abnormal in bipolar patients compared to the healthy participants. Researchers also found that when patients were experiencing depression the activity was abnormally high, shown by the yellow and red coloring at the top of the left brain image. When patients were experiencing manic highs the activity was abnormally low, shown by the blue and purple coloring in the right brain image.
